The Mamchari Debut was… February 8, 2010

The mamachari!

Alexa fiddling with the back wheel. James nowhere in sight!

almost a disaster and there was a point where I felt that buying the bike had been a huge mistake. It’s at moments like this that you really notice the difference in your children’s personalities. Alexa is so much more outgoing and daredevilish than James. Last week at the bike shop, Alexa was desperate to have a go on the bike and given that there was a child seat already fixed to the bike, she got to test ride the bike. James seemed equally interested, but as the back seat was not yet attached he had to make do with chasing the bike as me and Tadashi took turns to test ride it. Helmets were chosen and so we were set. The bike was delivered late last night and this morn we got rugged up for a bike ride. Alexa was raring to go. James was a different story. Once seated on the rear child seat, James started to panic and was clearly not comfortable on this mode of transport. Being the horrible parents we are, Tadashi and I just ignored his cries and tried to reassure him it would be fun. It took a couple of rides on the bike to convince him that it was indeed fun and my fears/regrets at buying the bike subsided, thankfully. Alexa got all teary and tired so Tadashi took her back up stairs to have a nap whilst James and me cycled to the shops to get a few provisions. No more tears and I think James actually enjoyed it. Neither of them like wearing a helmet though…Mummy now needs a rucksac and the kids are gonna have to get used to clutching their nursery bags.

Alexa has always been a bit more of a daredevil – climbing out of her cot in the middle of the night, climbing out of the highchair and just climbing (and falling) in general. James never showed any interest in climbing out of his cot and even when we lowered the mattress to its lowest position and had the side rail down so it looked like a toddler bed with a low side rail, he never attempted to climb out despite being only inches off the floor. Alexa loves to be held upside down, but James hates this kind of rough and tumble, though he loves to use my bed (and mummy) as a trampoline!

On Saturday there was a sayonnara party in our building(in the meeting room which is more spacious and better for kids to run amok) for Kumiko and her kids and Miki and her son. Both have bought new apartments in the local area and so will be leaving our mansion. I was made very welcome 4yrs ago when I moved into the building and will be sad to see them leave. I hope our paths will cross regularly, but I know as I have returned to work, I hardly ever get to see my neighbours anymore…(sniff sniff). It was interesting to see James and Alexa play with these Japanese kids. James was as big as the 6yr olds and at one point as we were clearing up, James was clearly very tired and was curled up on a zabuton (floor cushion). The older kids tried to drag it from under him, and a tug of war followed. James being the victor not before some 6 yr old attempted to kick him in the head as a last chance ditch at defeating the 3yr old. I did lose my temper at this point, but only briefly as didn’t want to appear like crazy foreign bitch in front of my neighbours. The 6yr old retreated when I yelled at him and nobody seemed to bat an eyelid anyway thankfully. Funny how other kids assume James is the same age as them too. I am anticipating all manner of “come and have a go if you think you are hard enough” kind of scenarios when he starts real school in 3 yrs time. It was an enjoyable afternoon actually and seeing as Tadashi was upstairs playing on his pc it was easy to take Alexa back home when she got a bit tired and return to the party to sup beer and champagne. Am seriously considering this “venue” for Alexa’s birthday party at the end of the month. Collapsible furniture that is stored in the closets leaving a big empty room suitable for all manner of party games like musical chairs. I know the carting food stuffs down stairs will be a pain whilst trying to entertain the kids, but might be worth the effort. Must have a word with the warden down stairs.

Noriyuki was in town again this week and he popped over yesterday afternoon for a cup of tea. Always lovely to see him and he got to witness the chaos that ensues in a home with two toddlers. Both kids were really shy when he arrived, but soon warmed to him perhaps because he came armed with Tim Tams. Anti-social Tadashi decided it best if he vacate the premises before Noriyuki arrived so as not to appear rude!?? His first idea was to close the sliding doors that separate our bedroom, where the pc is, and continue working on whatever project for work he said he had to finish. I told him he could at least leave the door open as I’m sure Noriyuki wouldn’t mind if he was busy doing work. So he decides that going to the library would be less rude. Unfortunately for him, they bumped into each other as he was leaving and Noriyuki was arriving. Anyway, I’m sure Noriyuki (infact all my friends) already knows how rude and anti-social Tadashi is and I hope he doesn’t take it personally.

Another bike ride today to Sun Street shopping Centre where I discovered the joys of mooching about the shops with two toddlers on the loose. Managed to persuade Alexa into a baby shoppingcart push chair thingy in Toys R Us, but the 100 yen shop (pokey little one at that!) was a no go area for two reasons – crowded narrow aisles overstocked with paraphenalia and a dog pushchair with two pooches sitting at the entrance to the shop. My two went wild when they saw the dogs and at first just gently petted the dogs. Soon they were woofing then screaming at the dogs, which set the littlest and most aggressive pooch off into a frenzy of its own. Despite clearly being barking mad and dressing her dogs in pink tutu like clothing, the owner, when she came out of the shop to investigate why her dogs were yelping, was fine about the abuse my kids aimed at her dogs. Anyway, we didn’t find any suitable pencil cases in the 100yen shop and so ducked into the 315 yen plastic crappy cutesy Disney-esque store opposite. We got lucky and found a small Elmo plastic handbag type thingy that was not much bigger than a pencil case and James decided he wanted this to put in his new coloured pencils. I got one for Alexa too and we also picked up two Sesame Street alarm clocks. May have to go back to this shop as they seemed to stock a lot of Elmo goods. You can never have too many items with Elmo’s face plastered all over it in my children’s opinion.

Three little words… February 5, 2010

Yes, I let my kids wear their new welllies in the house!

… “vomit clothes Tokyo” – typed into a search engine only to be directed here.

…”pooey soap suppository” – as above.

…”I said, No”. – most recent popular phrase uttered by my 3 year old son. I wonder where he heard that expression?

There have been lots of discoveries of late. Pointing his finger at me in a manner similar to ET, James encourages me to sniff his finger. Stupidly, I do sniff his finger and am met with the fusty smell of bum crack cheese!
“What’s this?”he asks.
I inquire, “Have you been sctratching your bum?”
“Yes.”
“Well, that’s what your bum smells like. This is why we have a bath everyday, James.”

I love the discoveries they make. Pointing to his scrotum he declares his testicles are “broken”. The centre “seam” clearly not to his liking.

And where do they acquire all those random facts? Bringing home left over peanuts from nursery on Setsubun (Feb 3rd?? Changing of the seasons festival thingy where kids throw beans or peanuts at ogres) I ask him what the peanuts are for. He didn’t know what peanuts were until I indicated the ones he’d brought home, but he proceeded to tell me that elephants eat them. I then get his version of how they all threw the peanuts and then picked them up – presumably the ones he brought home! They also came home with “ogre” hats too – freaky paper curly hair like Ronald MacDonald complete with golden horns. James was wearing his when I went to pick him up. Nice to know my kids are learning about Japanese culture from somewhere as I am hopeless (clueless) and Tadashi doesn’t really give a rats arse about Japanese culture (other than the corporate culture to which he is married!)

New words uttered by Alexa: “Daddy” “willy” “bum”. She has finally got her head around the idea that Tadashi has a name and so calls him “daddy” which is a big improvement on calling him nothing. (James, however, still insists on calling his daddy “Tadashi” much to my dismay. No amount of correction./gentle persuasion has worked so far.) Whenever I change James’ nappy Alexa will point and shout “willly” and/or “bum”. Seems to be a fascination with all toddlers I gather.

Both of my kids like to watch Youtube. With James asleep one night and Alexa wide awake, we sit down to watch a few kitties play with empty boxes. After each clip, she indicates which one she wants to watch next. Low and behold we stumble across several video clips of cats pooing into toilets! Well, she loved it and was straining and grunting away in encouragement. Sugar and spice and all things nice, eh?

Both kids are over the puking that had been doing the rounds, but have now got barking coughs and very runny noses. I wasn’t sure if I would be able to make it to the jidokan today to meet with Team North East but decided to brave it as a day spent at home didn’t seem that apealling to me or the kids. First stop this morn was the dentist – again was umming and arring about going due to the coughs but off we went and had our check ups. Next stop the library to take back James book on Katakana. Library was closed so had to make do with depositing it in the post box at the entrance. We had time to kill and so popped into Daiei to get some stuff for lunch and then on to the second hands kids’ shop where I managed to find a lovely pink and blue stripey cardy for Alexa (Tescos Cherokee brand no less) for 450 yen! James did a poo whilst playing with the toys and if my memory serves me correctly, I think that shop had the same affect on him the last time we visited. With 5 mins to spare before meeting a new Team North East member at the station I had to nip back into the Kumin Centre (home to the local library) to do a quick nappy change. Lovely loos as the whole centre was closed for refurbishment for the best part of last year.

It was a lovely day and loads of mums came along today for the meeting. I make it sound so formal – we hang out and chat safe in the knowledge that our kids are playing in a safe envirinoment and we don’t have to keep such a watchful eye on them. Gotta love jidokans. Didn’t get to stay too long as I am gradually beginning to understand that my kids may have outgrown the jidokan system. I’m guessing after a few days at hoikuen where they get free play all day and no play time outside, James and Alexa are keen to do something different. I know they are both bunged up and coughing – drugged up on cough meds this morn too and so this probably had an impact on their desire to vacate the premises not long after we’d arrived. I managed to placate them (fob them off) for a bit but it soon became clear that they needed to go. But not home. No sooner had we left the jidokan then they were running over to the park opposite and then announcing they wanted to go to another park, we headed to the other park just under the mansion we pass through to reach the jidokan. It was here we bumped into Louise and Priscilla and had a but of a chin wag about being working mums and whatnot. The long commutes (both of us travel 1 and a half hours to get to work) and long teaching hours (Louise, not me). How does one keep the house clean and tidy when you are not there all day? And if you are not there all day, how the hell does it get so messy anyhow!?

Came home with four “new” books to read. Today we had a book swap and it seems that we all have a similar taste in literature. Lots of us are avid Margaret Atwood readers and we also seem to share the habit of consulting the Booker Prize winners/shortlist when choosing a book to read. Now I have the arduous task of deciding which one to read first. “We need to Talk About Kevin” is a top contender, but seeing as I have just finished “The Kite Runner” I feel it might be better to start with “A Thousand Splendid Suns” by Khaled Hosseini.

Am still waiting for the new bike to arrive. Was hoping it would be here by today so could make our “mamachari debut” at Mizube, but no such luck. Tomorrow we have a party in our building – in the meeting room on the first floor. It’s a sayonnara party for two friends who are leaving the world of public housing due to purchases of apartments. Luckily they are in the immediate vicinity so we will all be able to stay in touch. Kumiko told me she and her hub had bought a new apartment last week – literally round the corner. It will be a busy year for her as she is due to have her thrid baby at the end of March. The move is planned for end of Feb (actually moving on her birhtday) and her daughter starts elementary school in April whilst her son will start at the local public yochien (nursery school). I’ll be going to work Mon to Friday as of April and so I wonder just when I will find time to see these friends. Kumiko was the woman who took me under her wing when I moved into the building just over four yrs ago. Oh yes, I can now report that I am not the only foreigner living in the building! I know that Mayumi whom I met when James was a baby moved into the building with her (ever-so-gorgeous) Korean husband. Though despite being incredibly tall and handsome, he doesn’t really stick out the way a tall blonde woman from Manchester does. Anyway a few times now I have noticed a guy that also looks kind of western, though his build and colouring and the general wearing of a hat, glasses etc…. I actually wasn’t sure from a distance if he was foreign or not. Well the other day we were up close in the lift and I realised he was obviously a foreigner so I asked where he was from and he replied “France”. Well I never! He was quite surprised to discover a British woman living in his building too. Didn’t get to chat for long and I’m sure months will pass before we share the lift together or our paths cross again. Three foreigners living in the same building – public housing at that! Who’d have thunk it!?

Let’s i-phoning! February 2, 2010

Had a busy weekend and the kids have been worn out. Just a few tantrums caused by changes to routines and being out just a little after dark. Tadashi and me took the kids to deepest, darkest Adachi-Ku on Saturday to get kitted out with a mamachari (mummies’ bike with child seats). Have never been this far into the sticks before and it really did seem very different to the Tokyo I know. For those in Kanagawa, think Hiratsuka on a bad day. （Helen, you know I’m kidding, right?) We finally find this bike shop that sells the bikes with the two wheels at the front (for extra safety and to improve balance) and Alexa got to try the bike out, and James didn’t seem to mind and understood that his seat was going to be fitted to the back and he would just have to wait til it was delivered to “have a go” on the bike. Alexa seems really keen to ride the bike and had a hissy fit when we lifted her out. We got to choose helmets (only after I had changed two very pooey nappies in the loos at the back. Was very embarrassing trying to discuss the pros and cons of this super mamachari all the while pretending that it wasn’t my children that stank of poo!) James opted for a black pirate helmet and Alexa wouldn’t be swayed by the pink flowery ones and decided upon a sky blue one. It should be arriving sometime this week.

Tadashi had been out in the morn to get us set up with iphones. We have decided to change phone providers and as iphones are currently free at softbank we have switched from Willcom. Anyway, he had to return home as they needed both my passport and gaijin card as proof of identity and so on our way back from the bike shop in the sticks we popped back to Yodabashi Camera to sign up for the latest in phone technology. The kids were going mental – well James was anyhow. He threw a fit when the train map he was reading blew right out of hands and half way across the concourse in the subway. Tadashi refused to go back for it and so James decided to pull his shoes off and throw them away too! He was REALLY tired and REALLY fed up of being in the buggy despite having run around in Adachi ku. Tadashi hates to let him walk anywhere, but I insisted that we let him stretch his legs. He holds my hand and is getting very safety conscious. I guess I spend a great deal more time with the kids and so know their capabilities more. We have the phones, we have a bike now so I should be thankful. The bike will be a great help in the mornings especially if we change daycare facilities in April.

We went to a great party on Sunday. Akira, my friend, Rachel’s boy turned 4 at the end of January and she put on a lovely party for him. The buffet was second to none – lots of filo pastry nibbles and a lovely pasta thingy and falafel (yummy yummy!) The cake was fantastic – homemade naturally – a Spiderman scaling the side of a building! How she thinks these things up I’ll never know. It has made me realise I have to do more than the celebration sponge decorate it yourself with strawberries and cream jobby for Alexa’s birthday, which is fast approaching! Alexa surprisingly won the Pin the Tail on Wan Wan game, everybody got a little something in the Pass the Parcel and a going home goody bag. James spent most of the party in Akira’s bedroom raiding his toys. Mummy spent a great deal of time swigging back wine and beer ( I later learned I ahd been drinking very strong Belgian beer at one point, which would account for the squiffiness en route home.) It was a good day. It always is a good day at Rachel’s. I have fond memories of a Christmas spent at Rachel’s a couple of years ago and I think I blogged about the wonderful buffet then aswell!

Anyway, I have a busy week. Tomorrow I am meeting my old Japanese teacher for lunch and to discuss doing lessons again. She emailed last week to see how I was and stuff – touting for business i know- but I do need to kick my Japanese up the bum so to speak. Feel I have plateaued and am stagnating. Must try harder. Though Tadashi phpned today to “ask” if it was Ok for him to go and work in Osaka for 2 months! I said well if I say “no” what will happen? He replied he’d be in trouble. So you are not asking for my permission you are really just fore-warning me of the situation. I had to remind him of his Thursday morning hoikuen duties (he takes the kids as I have to leave for work an hour before daycare opens on Thursdays). He says he’ll come back on Thursday mornings just to take the kids to daycare…. Mmmm we’ll see. I don’t have too many weeks left at school and the next two Thursdays are hols (one national and the other due to entrance tests. I actually have no lessons this week due to these tests – yeah for being a pt teacher who still gets paid even when she hasn’t taught the lessons!) I know why he was so keen to get the mamachari bike – it’ll make life so much easier for me and then he won’t feel guilty about doing bugger all on the home front for two months.

Puke and more puke January 26, 2010

So I started this post four days ago and things have just been a little bit hectic that I have had to ditch the blogging. Most of my time over the past few days has involved mopping up puke in the early hours of the morning and hosing down sheets and clothes before dropping them in the washing machine. I arrived at work this morn and no sooner had I plonked my bag on my desk when I heard my phone ringing. Hoikuen calling to say that Alexa had a temp of 37 degrees. Not particularly life threatening in my book, but in this oinky world we live in, nobody is taking any risks it seems. Off I go to inform the deputy head of my predicament and I find Jenny in the library to ask her to cover my lessons. Needless to say when I pick up Alexa the staff have got James all ready to go too. I was hoping for an afternoon of fannying about with my prep for work but I was under strict instructions to construct an intricate network of train track instead.

I guess it all began on Saturday night. Alexa was asleep next to me when I hear James crying and I think to myself “Shit” there’s gonna be four of us in the bed. I go to investigate and find James sitting up on the top bunk next to a pool of milky puke. Luckily (!?) the puke was only on the sheets and the futon had been spared of any splashes. I get him down and change pjs and transfer him to my bed where Tadashi and Alexa lay asleep completely oblivious to the goings on. As I am hosing the puke off the sheets in the bathroom, I hear James moaning again. I go in the bedroom just in time to see him puke all over the pillows and Alexa’s hair. More bed stripping, and pj changing and cleaning up bodies and beds. We got a bit more sleep before James was puking again and I decided that we would get to the emergency doc at the crack of dawn (well at 9am anyway). We were the first there and met our regular paediatrician in the hallway, which was nice. Though, I’m sure James didn’t think having a suppository shoved up his bum was nice. Poor baby.

Got ourselves on yet another hoikuen (nursery) waiting list on Friday and am thinking of ringing a few more just to be on the safe side. We will be needing a bike soon too and I am having second thoughts about the super duper mummy’s bike with the stabilisers. I’m thinking it might be a bit wide at the back and given that I wiil be cycling along crowded pavements I think it will be a bad idea. It also will cost 210,000 yen so we are going to shop around. I’m hoping to find somewhere nearby that sells the shopping bikes with two front wheels. I think this type might provide better balance for carrying two kids on child seats. Really think that having a bike will be a big help in the mornings getting everybody off to nursery and work.

Had one of those “only in Japan” moments on Friday. After visiting the nursery decided to pop to the local jidokan for a play, but enroute Alexa fell asleep in the baby car and the jidokan is on the 2F and I didn’t fancy my chances of getting her out of the buggy and up the stairs and into a bed at the playrooms without waking her. And as James was up for a long walk, I decided to pop to Sun Street shopping centre. I had updated James on our plans and told him we were not going anywhere near the toy cars and trains until I had changed his nappy. Desperately in need of some uninterrupted time playing with the transportation on the shelves, James suggests en route to the shops that we change his nappy right now… we were conveniently walking past one of those hideous public toilets where you can walk past and see every Ken Dick and Taro doing his business. Which would take longer, to persuade a three yr old that changing a nappy in this piss-ridden hole is just not going to happen or to just change James’ nappy and have done with it? We are standing in the doorway of this public convenience, James with his pants off and the breeze blowing against his bum, me praying that the puddles on the floor are water and not wee, when an old man wanders in and promptly starts to urinate in the urinal. What is one to do? No, “’scuse me miss” or anything. He didn’t wash his hands once he’d finished either which just proves my theory that given that most men don’t wash their hands after going for a slash, that on avergae you touch 15 willies a day. Absent mindedly holding the handrail down the steps at the station should really be avoided and every door knob (apt name if ever there was one!) should be approached with caution as no doubt it has been tainted by some filthy bugger with poor hygeine standards. Anyway, is this openness in toilets (both in doorways and in behaviour) strictly a Japanese thing?

Should really talk about the positives too as there are plenty of other lovely Japanese oyaji (old blokes). For instance, the local sports centre across the street from us has been under refurbishment for months. The whole campus has been off limits and a chirpy little chappy has been guarding the area for months now. Given the proximity to our building, I say hello to this man everyday. He acts as a lollypop man and escorts me and the kids (quite unnecessarily as it is a proper zebra crossing) across the road everyday. Last week he comes running up to me as I was dragging the kids home from nursery – one of those days where they both walked home, which meant the 15 minute walk took more like 50 mins. He runs over and hands me two gift bags for the kids explaining that it is nothing special just some notebooks and pencils for the kids and a bit of candy. I ask why and he says that everyone has been given them. Everyone that uses the crossing in fron of the sports centre? I thank him and finally get the kids inside where they rip open these bags and start doodling away as I throw something together for dinner. I tell Tadashi about this and he seems to think that the guy is probably a nice old man with no kids of his own as he thinks it seems strange to be receiving gift bags willy nilly from construction company guardmen. Nice gesture all the same. A few months ago another random old man handed me some colouring books one day when I was in the lift in our building. I guess for every rude obasan (old lady) who tells me how huge my kids are, there is a nice old bloke supplying my kids with stationery.

Am hoping Alexa is better tomorrow as I really need to get to work and finish prepping my 2nd yrs for their final speaking test of the year. Doesn’t look hpeful though as Alexa’s temp as 39.3 this evening. Fingers crossed the cocktail of meds that the doc supplied this evening work their magic.

Zonked January 16, 2010

“Mummy, mite,” says James this morning. (Look, mummy) I turn to see an arch of urine hit the living room floor. It had been a typical morning where James refused to let me remove his nighttime nappy. “Not yet” as he is wont to say. Having successfully removed the offending nappy, he then wouldn’t let me put on a clean one. This is the day he decides to start wearing underpants I thought to myself… No, he did not want to wear underpants either. So I leave him running around with a bare bottom and busy myself with the mundane chores that have to be done. After mopping up the puddle of wee and clean James up, he decides he does want to do another wee (finish off the same wee?) in the loo. He gets a sticker for his chart and another one because he ate all his breakfast (and more!) and another sticker for something else I completely forget what for! Everybody is happy. Phew!

Tadashi and I decided to go to Ueno to check out the super duper “safey” mamachari bicycles today so we rug up the kids and head out the door. I suggest going the JR route via Akihabara because I know there are lifts along this route and with double buggy I don’t like venturing off to unknown stations only to find there are no lifts. I check the station accessibilty map for Iriya (入谷) and learn that there are steps only so we decide to walk from Ueno station. We go via the Ginza line – Tadashi’s preferred route – and are faced with escalators and a double buggy at Mitsukoshimae station. I take both the kids out of the buggy and hold their hands as we get on the escalator. Tadashi deals with the buggy but is clearly not happy about the kids being on the escalator. It was no problem really, but I did insist that we came home via the tried and tested JR route as I didn’t ancy our chances of an easy time coming down an escalator with a double buggy.

The bike shop turned out to be a company that specialise in wheelchairs both manual and electric. They were expecting us and so had a couple of models of their safety bicycles to the ready. The kids were going mental as they do when they are taken to places with no entertainment for kids. Though Alexa soon spotted an electric wheelchair thingymebobs that she just had to have a go of. I turn around to see her trying to drive this pensioner-mobile! (have no idea whta they are callled.) I was surprised at how hard it was to steer this bike. The pedals are positioned slightly forward – a bit like a toddler’s tricycle yet I found I had better control over the bike when I leaned back as if riding a Harley Davidson. Hunching over the handlebars had me careering alll over the place. We now have 3 decisions to make; long version or regular; pedal power or electric; pink, green or silver?

http://ww.kawamura-cycle.co.jp/karugamoinfo.html

Have seen two private nurseries over the course of the last week. The one I went to on Friday was lovely. The staff seemed very friendly and the place was new – opened last year. Again huge waiting lists though this may change as I am led to assume that lots of mums who apply for public daycare get themselves on the waiting lists at private ones too, clearly covering all bases should they fail to get in at public daycare. I decided to work out just how much it would cost to send my two there for a full week and nearly had a heart attack. I came up with the figure 135,000 yen per month. I can say sayonnara to my p/t salary! Using my intermediate Japanese literacy skills I read the small print of the nursery brochure as I couldn’t be sure I had fully understood the added extras for early starts and extra meals etc… Turns out I had moisunderstood the grid outlining the basic fees and I discover that there is a 25% discount of the older child’s fees if you have 2 children enrolled at the nursery. Tadashi also seems to think that I will get some money back from the City Hall too. Fingers crossed the waiting list shrinks after the public daycare have finished finalising enrollments. I reckon with this new knowledge the fees could be around 86,000 yen. Almost double what I pay now, but the fact that there are over 30 kids as opposed to the 5 or 6 at the current daycare and the fact that they provide lunch – big bloody bonus – makes it all the more appealing. I just know James would be happier in an environment that provides more stimulation instead of just free play all day. I know there will be a lot of free play here too, but they will go to the park and eat healthy food with other kids – I’m led to assume this has a big impact on kids’ appetities and desire to try new foods. Hopefully they’ll be a bit more hands on with toilet training too! Have another Kengaku on Monday at Global Kids in Morishita – it will involve a two stop train journey, though the nursery is close to the station and the train line is also one I can use to get to work. I even think that with the new super duper bike I could cycle all the way there on days with good weather.

The kids have been sleeping terribly recently. Alexa wakes up everynight around 2am. As they share a bedroom you have to get the awake child out of there pronto and the only place to go really is back to my bed. Too cold to be pacing the living room trying to persuade a toddler back to sleep. One night last week all four of us were in our big double bed. Alexa wriggles like mad and gets overheated under the futon. I decided to take her back to her bed, but she insisted I got in with her. Am so glad we got them regular sized bunk beds and not toddler beds! James likes to fall asleep on our bed and I transferr him to the top bunk when he is safely in the land of nod. Alexa has cottoned on to this situation and clambers on the bed and gets all cosy under the futon. The other night they both fell asleep there with little bother bar the odd threat with the bunk beds from me. Tonight after a strenuous day out and a run in the park enroute home, James and Alexa both fell asleep on the sofa whilst drinking milk and watching the Teletubbies. I love it when they completey zonk out. Just hope they stay in their own beds for the course of the night as I am desperate for a full night’s sleep.

Other news… I now have my new glasses. I think I like them. It’s always the way when you get new glasses it takes me ages to get used to them. I think they sit abit too high off my face – gaijin big nose syndrome. About 95% of the glasses in any glasses shop in Japan look ridiculous on my pale British face. There are loads of glasses I like – this is the country of extremely funky eyewear afterall. Sadly, I suit only a handful of frames. This time round I found only 2 pairs of glasses in the shop that looked OK and didn’t sit too high off my face. Having kids also means that shopping around isn’t an option and so I went to ONE shop that came recommended and made use of their free lens deal. I even have the thinnest thinnest lenses you can get ( otherwise I would have milk bottle bottom glasses!) which usually cost a bomb, but these too were free. Frames were 21,000 yen so not a bad deal really. Naturally all the frames under 10,000 yen looked ridiculous on me. Both kids noticed my new glasses immediately when I went to pick them up from nursery. James particularly likes the flower design along the arms of the frames. Just hope I don’t look like too much of an old lady in them!

Oh well, gonna watch an episode of House MD before bed. Night night.

Spectacle-less January 10, 2010

Kept the kids off nursery on Friday and took them to a jidokan in Ryogoku to meet up with Team North East. Took ages to get out of the house in the morning and I wanted to get there early as we had an appointment for a Kengaku (look around a school or in our case a nursery) at 2pm. Anyhow, we get to the jidokan a little after 11am and I knew that James would want longer than the 2hrs playtime we now had. A good crowd was there and it was nice to see everyone again. James refused to eat lunch preferring to play with the trainset. Alexa ate a fair bit despite clearly being tired as she missed her morning nap. Had to pack up and leave shortly after lunch and James flatly refused to go. “No, no, go yet!” I easily managed to get Alexa all rugged up and booted as she was desperate to get a kip in the buggy. As I was chasing James round the jidokan, Alexa commited the unpardonable sin of wandering around the jidokan with her shoes on – cue evil glares from the staff. Trying to get my own boots on, James grabs the other one and runs off with it, Alexa follows with shoes on and naturally there are more glares and “please don’t let you kid walk around in the playroom with her shoes on” kind of comments. No assistance is offered. I should point out that the jidokan is on the 2F. Why is it that so many jidokans have the playrooms on the 2F? My local jidokan is also on the 2F, which is a bit of a pain in the backside when you think about all the crap you have to cart about with you when you have TWO toddlers. Also a big pisser if you arrive and one of them is asleep and you have to walk around the block a million times as you know you would never get them up the stairs and in one of the beds without waking them up. I whinge, I know, but the endless probs of transporting two kids is mind boggling. Had to get Emma to come and help me as was impossible to carry James (kicking and screaming) down the stares whilst carrying all our belongings and helping Alexa down the stairs too. Emma did a sterling job of calming James down whilst I got the buggy ready – it’s one of those places that insist you collapse the buggy and leave it in the entrance. Nearly forgot my board buggy which had to be removed before collapsing the buggy. Thanks to Emma neither of my children ran out into the road either. Thank you, Emma.

Have finally got my new schedule through. I’ll be working 5 days from April and as promised the school have worked it so that I have no first lessons. The only bummer is the ONE lesson on Thursdays and it’s last lesson of the day too! Will get my hoikuen application in at the City Hall as soon as possible too, though flicking through the info booklet I don’t fancy my chances as the points system they use to decide who gets a place is very strict. Even if I ask my company to lie on the forms and put down my scehdule as 6 hours a day (my Mon and Tues schedule) 5 days a week, I still won’t gather enough points to be anywhere near the top of the list. 6 hours a day gets you 8 points. This is the lowest number of points you can get per day. You have to work very long hours to get the max of 12 points a day.

The nursery we went to look at was nice and new, albeit very small. Lunch is provided – Yeah! They take the kids to the park – Yeah! And it seems really structured which I think is something that James needs. It is pricey at 46,000 yen per child, but there is a chance of getting some cash back through the City Hall – all dependent on salary. There is also no parking for buggies. Should we get in to this quasi-public hoikuen, I can not imagine walking there with two toddlers at toddlers’ pace, the idea of walking there and walking back home to dump the buggy is also not an option so am thinking of getting a proper bicycle fit for carrying two child seats. Tadashi and I had a look on the internet and have found a store not too far from Ueno that sells these bikes with big stabiliser type wheels on the back. The bike itself looks lower than the normal shopping bike too, which makes it look all the more appealing too. At 84,000 yen, they don’t come cheap and I’m guessing the prices quoted did not include the extras like the child seats. If we go really top of the range, we can get an electric assisted bike which would probably push the price of the bike way over 100,000 yen so have to go for pedal power really. Am very excited about the possibility of cycling locally with the kids in tow rather than pushing the double Graco though.

Have just been putting Alexa to bed and she grabbed my glasses and somehow managed to snap them in half. I threw away my old emergency megane (glasses) as these too had suffered at the hands of the kids. I am practically blind without optical support and am wearing a pair of Tadashi’s glasses (not reallly strong enough, but will have to do) as I can’t be bothered to put any contacts in so late in the day. Off to the megane shop tomorrow. I hate buying glasses in Japan as hardly any frames suit me and then there is the high nose problem which means that most frames sit about an inch off your face making you look all the more ridiculous. Wasn’t really planning on forking out cash for new specs this month and so am hoping they still have the sales on.

January Sales January 6, 2010

Back at work tomorrow, but have been a busy bunny enjoying my last few days of freedom.

Another lovely day was spent round at Emma and Keisuke’s place on Sunday. Again I was the only mother with absent husband. Tadashi began to devise ways to get out of this invitation about three days before the event. He had a stomache ache which must be the start of a cold adding a headache into the mix the following day. Finally on the day of the party, the first words out of his mouth as he stumbled out of bed were, “Nodo ga itai. Kyo zutto ie de iru tsmori.” (I’ve got a sore throat. I’m gonna stay home all day today.) Not that he was missed. I’d been at Emma’s about ten minutes or more before she realised that Tadashi wasn’t with me. He’s hardly ever with me at social gatherings so I guess people have got used to it just being me and the kids. His loss. Was a great day and I did get a wee bit pished. Kids were knackered mind and were a bit of a handful when we got home, but they crashed out and I didn’t hear a peep out of them til morn.

Spent Tuesday at the Sales. I decided to head to Sunamo Shopping Centre in Minami Sunamachi for a change and because I knew they had a Kaldi Coffee shop there. Am out of Vegemite and this is the one place I know that definitely sells it. Searched and searched for the Vegemite and in the end I had to ask a member of staff. She took me to the shelf where it should be and low and behold, they were sold out. Not easy to spot even if they had some on the shelf. Low down and mixed up with the jams and whatnot. Will have to get some en-route home from work one day from the Kyodo branch – bit of a pain as the shop is the other side if the station from work and don’t always have the time to potter about the shop before dashing for the train. I digress.

Very successful shopping trip. Remembered a kids shop in the centre that was cheap as chips the last time I was there and headed off ready for a good rummage. You have to rummage as this shop has lots of stuff, mostly ghastly Japanesey cutesy stuff you wouldn’t let your kids be seen dead in, but in my experience there are always a few gems to be found. I managed to get James lots of t-shirts at ridiculous prices. Of late he seems to have grown even bigger and getting t-shirts on and off is a bit of a struggle. He now owns a new red Lightening McQueen t-shirt, a navy t-shirt with a big red fire engine on it, a grey t-shirt with a big yellow crane on it and a reddy-brown hooded top (TOMICA) with a police car and a fire engine on the front. He Luurrvves them and I can’t get him out of them. Nothing to do with size and big foreheads – all are size 120cm which seems ridiculous when you think he is only 3 and a half yrs old! Alexa got a lilac fleece (hoodless thank god), a Hello Kitty t-shirt and a pair of black leggings as her current ones are really too tight and perhaps a bit on the thin side. She needs something a bit warmer. She is less desperate for new clothes which is just as well really as most of the stuff for little girls was smocky type tops emblazened with the usual strawberries and rabbits. What’s with the obsession with strawberries and rabbits in Japanese children’s wear??? Found a yellow Beetle mini car too so will add this to my stash of cheap cars as rewards collection for the kids.

Today was spent in Omotesando having lunch with Nicole. Lovely lovely afternoon was had and we did a bit of window shopping too. We ended up having lunch at Los Chicas which I thought had closed down, but HAD been closed for refirbishment. I say HAD as it re-opened over a year ago. Yikes, I reallly don’t get out that much… The place looks much better, more open-plan and it was in need of a lick of paint or something as I remember it being a bit grubby looking. I love the food there and always enjoy it when I go there. We always find lots to talk about and I had to keep reminding myself of the time and that I had to get the train home to go and pick the kids up from nursery.

Talking of nursery… poor Alexa was screaming blue murder when I took them yesterday morning. This morning she refused to enter the playroom, but eventually decided she would go and play. There were no tears thankfully. I reallly want to get them in a different nursery for April. Must ask Tadashi to ring a few of the private ones near here. I have rung one and they told me to ring back in March which seems a bit late given that the new school year starts in April. I need him to check that I’ve understood the application procedure properly. Will submit my public hoikuen application in to the Ward Office in Jan once I know my schedule/hours for the next academic yr. No chance of getting in I think, but have to try…

Both James and Alexa wanted to fall asleep on my bed tonight. James usually goes to bed here while Alexa nods off in ber bunk, but tonight she joins him under the covers. I threaten them with the immediate removal and with plonking in bunk beds if either one of them gets out of bed and starts messing around. There is chatter and laughter mostly coming from James. A few “mummy, mummy” cries from Alexa which I ignore, but go in twice to remind them (James mainly) of my intention to put them in the bunks. Amazingly, James nods off first, but Alexa takes a little longer but soon she to was in the land of nod. Great. 8:30pm and I have the evening to myself. Nursery prep is done, have showered, and even made butties for their lunch boxes tomorrow as I must leave at 7am and don’t relish my chances of achieving this aim if I have to be fannying about making bentos in the morn. Hope the kids co-operate tomorrow. It’s been a bit stressful the passed two mornings doing the practice runs of getting them out of the door in time. Today was better and we arrived at nursery at 8:30am. Better than yesterday when we got there at 9:35am!!!

Better get myself to bed as have a 5am start in the morning.

Daytripper January 1, 2010

We headed off as planned to meet Jenny and her hub, her brother and his girlfriend in Fujisawa to begin our whistle-stop tour of Kamakura on the 30th. Dithered a bit in the morn over whether to brave the long journey with the single buggy and take the baby carrier or whether to take the more cumbersome tandem tank. Opted for the latter and was glad I did in the end as both James and Alexa needed extended naps in the comfort of the back seat. Long train journeys are never without drama and on this excursion I really think I got to show off my parenting skills to the fullest. I had been busy feeding the kids senbe to keep them from going mental as it must have felt like they had been on trains for half their lifetime, when Alexa starts to choke so I pat her on the back hoping that the Heimlich (sp?) manoeuvre (sp) would not be necessary. I realise she is about to be sick and in a moment of panic I cup my hands and catch this spew in my hands in full view of the fellow daytrippers on a crowded train to Shonan. Realising we were getting off at the next stop, I had to find something pronto so I could deposit this vomit. Luckily I located a small plastic bag that was holding some more of the offending senbe so I managed to empty the contents of my hands and then search for the wet wipes. I was amazed at how I got us off the train with hardly a spec of vomit on our clothes – just a bagful swinging from the buggy handles! Alexa was fine and was (unbelieveably) soon demanding more senbe.

Met Jenny and had to delay introductions to her brother and had to embarrassingly admit that I needed to wash my hands properly as I had just caught a load of sick in my hands. First impressions of the crazy obaasan with odd parenting skills?! They must have thought I was a mad women. “Sorry, I can’t shake hands with you just yet as I’ve just caught a load of puke in my hands! Would you mind if I freshen up first?” Everyone got cleaned up with soap and water and I did a couple of nappy changes and we were off on the Enoden – one of James’ favourite trains. I thought this would be the most picturesque way of seeing a bit of the area and giving us chance to jump on and off the train and see some of the sights.

First stop the Big Buddha at Hase. Had to walk in single file up the road to reach the Big Buddha, but I don’t think they were too worried as the crazy British woman had prepared some sandwiches which we munched as we wandered along. Everybody was starving and I was glad I had the forethought to whip up some smoked salmon and cream cheese panini that morning. I forget how time consuming sightseeing can be and how much kids slow you down. I seemed to be stopping every two minutes to wipe noses, unwrap blankets from the wheels of the buggy and pick up toy cars that had been dropped either accidentally or on purpose. It was great to have several pairs of hands to help round up James and Alexa whom I had let loose once inside the grounds of the Buddha. Poor mites had been strapped to the buggy for what must have seemed like days to them.

True to form they ran amok and James took to throwing stones at the cast iron incense holder standing in front of the Buddha itself. The gravel and stones in general were thrown around as he squealed with delight. Noticing other people eating ice-cream, he askes for one and I stupidly gave in knowing full well that he can not eat a Mr Whippy icecream fast enough before it melts all over him! He was happy anyhow and managed to drip most of the icecream over the footrest of the buggy and not over his clothes so no major cleaning involved. We walked to Hachimangu Shrine which gave Alexa a chance to have a nap in the back of the buggy. I think Jenny and her family got to see some nice parts of Kamakura though admittedly only two of the main sites.

We boarded the Enoden one more time and Jenny and her clan went off home to reserve some energy for their New Year celebrations. I decided to do a bit of shopping in Fujisawa and went back to the Odakyu department store to check out the shoes. What luck, the Clarks boots were on sale and seeing as the zip has bust on my favourite wear everyday Clarks boots, I felt justified in purchasing a replacement pair. Also got some ugly slipper boot thingymebobs from Uniqlo as feet are feeing the cold this past week or so.

New Year came and went really. Not a lot you can do when you have little kiddies. It actually felt like any other day to me. We did take the kids to the park on the 31st and bumped into Akiko and her husband, Dom feeding the ducks with their two boys. Had a chat but it was freezing cold that day and gloves had been left at home. Was desperate to be at home in front of the fire (if we had one!) Tadashi showed off his excellent social skills by saying to Dom, “Nice to meet you” when in fact he has been round to Dom’s house and enjoyed a rather delicious BBQ in the summer! Dom pointed this out to him. I was soooo embarrassed. Am hoping that Tadashi doesn’t come along to Emma’s on Sunday as he will no doubt be out of his depth. He hates any kind of social gathering claiming that he can’t speak English well enough, but all couples invited are usually “international” and one half of the couplings is usually Japanese.

Time for bed…. first sleep in the Year of the Tiger.

Happy New Year everyone!

Christmas Boxing Day and Nicole and the Gang December 29, 2009

Tadashi went to work as usual on Christmas morn and I got ready to take the kids to Emma’s for a proper Christmas celebration. We left at around 11am and James decided he was going to walk all the way to Kameido – about a 40 min walk. We get to Emma’s place at 12:30pm! I’m sure she must have been wondering where the hell we were as I’d phoned to say we were on our way as we were leaving our building. Alexa was not happy about sitting in the back of the double tandem buggy and kept returning to an upright position each time I lay her down to sleep. Naturally, she finally fell asleep as we neared Emma’s home and I had to take James to the park to give Alexa a bit longer in the land of nod. (Emma’s place is a house and on the 2nd floor and it would have meant wakng Alexa upon arrival.)

It was a lovely day spent with Emma and her husband, Keisuke, Christine and her husband, Laurent and all the kids. (James 3, Noa, 2, Alexa nearly 2 and Adelie 1) I love visiting people or having people over as it has a wonderful effect on my kids. At home, I don’t get a moments peace as they are both always needing my attention or assistance – “Mummy, look at this”,” Mummy, I can’t do it.” And just general whimpering everytime I try to go to the loo solo and there is always squabbling over toys and territory that I have to umpire. When faced with a different environment, different toys, more people to play with, I am literally made redundant. I was now free to assemble my mozzeralla cheese balls wrapped in smoked salmon and arrange the tomatoes and leeks wrapped in bacon on a plate as the pumpkin soup I’d made was heated up. Emma had gone to town on her roast beef dinner and was on top of everything all that needed to be done was the Yorkshire puds. Kids got fed but ate very little preferring to explore the wonders in Noa’s toy box. I was amazed that there were few squabbles over the toys, only occasionally did my two come to blows over a coveted toy – the ride along thingy and the Rodeo (?) bouncy thingy.

It was a very lovely day where mummy got to have a few drinkies and lots of gorgeous grub. The roast beef was yummy, but the highlight for me had to be the Kyoto carrots and Emma’s home made mince pies, naturally. The kiddies exchanged gifts and they all seemed really pleased with what they got. James got a Giant Activity Sound Book – Lightening McQueen colouring book with push button music and coulouring instructions. It is, as the title suggests, HUGE! Both enjoy colouring in it and I am rather pleased to see that James doesn’t mind “sharing” it with Alexa. Alexa got a battery operated doggie which she takes to bed with her now. Very cute indeed. Mummy got to sample her first Eggnog courtesy of Keisuke the bartender – I was handed a rather large Southern Comfort and coke upon my arrival too, which went down wonderfully.

James decided he was going to walk home and he made it nearly all the way but succumbed to the lure of the double buggy as Alexa slept soundly in the back seat. A lovely family day. I did forget to take photos which is a big shame. Though I do remember both Christine and Emma leaping up to grab their cameras to capture the image of a chocolate coated Alexa!

Boxing Day was spent round at Ben and Kazu’s new gaff in Nishi Waseda. I was going to go alone and leave both the kids with Tadashi, but I decided it might be easier for us both if we took one child each. I was fearful of the devastation I would return home to after a few hours away. This would have been the first time I had left Tadashi to look after the kids for a sizable length of time during daylight hours. After a fraught morning where I basically laid the law down and told Tadashi that I can not be soley responsible for the kids and that he HAD to become a team player. Many words were said, most rather loudly but I think he finally understands that he can not ignore his responsibilities anymore.

As I was getting ready to leave for my afternoon drinking session, I heard Tadashi asking James if he wanted to go to Sun Street shopping centre – he has never been further than the local park with both kids on his own. I offered to take Alexa with me as I knew this would mean that everyone would have an easier day. Alexa is a charmer and I knew she would be no problem at an unbaby-proofed apartment. James would also get some one on one time with daddy and I feel given his current tendancy to burst into tears and have tantrums, I knew this might have a positive effect on his behaviour.

I received an photo via email during the course of the afternoon – James with a new haircut. He’d even taken him to the expensive kiddies “choki choki” place which I thought was rather surprising given the fact that he spends 1000 yen on his own haircuts and doesn’t see the value in investing in a decent hairdresser. James’ haircut looks fab – he has a lovely shaped head and suits it reallly short. Tadashi hates the fact that both his children have my curly unruly hair and is always on at me to cut their hair. James looks so much more mature with his hair cropped to his scalp. Not sure what we are going to do with Alexa’s hair which is currently a cutesy curly mess, but luckily she is stilll young enough to carry it off! A trip to the pet shop to look at the kittens and puppies and all in all I think James had a a very enjoyable day. He got a new car at the haircut place – every haircut is rewarded with a toy. You ahve to have something more to show for the 3600 yen price I guess.

Alexa was all shy and demure upon arrival at Ben and Kazu’s place but soon warmed to another guest, Nao and was bouncing and jumping on him in no time at all. Would have loved to have stayed longer but I didn’t want to keep Alexa out too late and it was already getting dark as we left the four guys to continue their drinking and munching.

We had guests round at our place on the 28th – my old roommate Nicole and her mum and dad, who are here in Japan for the festive season. It had been 5 yrs since their last visit and in that time I have got married and produced two children. Before they arrived I decided to nip to the supermarket to stock up on milk as we were nearly out and it would have been catastrophic if there were no milk in the fridge. Alexa had just fallen asleep and was snoring away so I decided James and me could nip out for ten mins to get the required items. He insisted on taking Alexa’s baby doll and stroller and was in his element pushing his baby round the streets and the supermarket. We got a lot of smiles from passersby who had clearly never seen a boy toddler showing such an interest in dolls. Sooo cute, if you ask me. Alexa loves the doll too and it was so cute to hear her say “night night baby” as she gently patted the doll’s stomach that morning. Just what mummy does to get her to go to sleep! It was a very lovely afternoon. The kids luurrve Auntie Nicole and she was kept busy with their demands for piggy back rides. More presents were exchanged – James got a yellow jeep along with some great kitchen paraphenalia that he is to share with Alexa. I think he understands this idea! I’d bought Nicole a few bits and bobs and one was a copy of the book, “The Kite Runner”. I’d clearly chosen a book that would interest her as she had already read it! I now have a new book to read on the trains in the morn when I return to work in January.

Over the past few days James has been a lot better. he tantrums have n’t stopped altogether, but he seems to be a much happier chappy and is getting along better with his sister. They actuallly play really well together – ots of bouncing on the bed and tickling games, but if toys are involved, James suddenly gets all possessive and stroppy and starts dictating which toys she can touch. I’m not sure if this change in behaviour is due to the fact that he hasn’t been to nursery since Christmas Eve, or whether he is generally feeling a bit more chipper. He still asks every morning “No no go nursery”? Am dreading the return to daycare in Jan…

Off to Kamakura tomorrow to meet Jenny and her family. Another day out on various trains which i hope will keep James on top form.

Emperor’s Birthday Christmas Wedding Anniversary December 24, 2009

I said to myself last year that I would not do Christmas in Japan this year. Now I remember why I said this. It’s really hard to make things feel Christmassy in Japan particularly when you have a hubby who isn’t the slightest bit interested in celebrating anything. The day did start well and he actually got up when the kids awoke at the rather late time of 6:45ish. He even went in to help them out of bed. James got his purple mini and Alexa had a stuffed pretty pink ballerina rabbit – I had put a stocking on their beds before I went to bed the night before. All the other pressies were under the tree. The opening of presents ensued, both James and Alexa needed help and I had to keep asking Tadashi drag himself away from his computer to assist and to watch the kids’ reactions. Yes, he was more interested in using his computer than spending time with his kids on this family day. Didn’t take long for all the presents to get unwrapped and I think the kids were pleased with what they got. The baby doll and pushchair were a big hit especially.

I had peeled spuds and carrots the night before so I just had to get things steamed/roasted/baked using my tiny mocrowave oven and two ring gas hob. I had ordered a ready cooked chicken which was being delivered that day so I knew we would be having a later lunch, but this was fine. Just needed to heat up the chicken and veggies and make some gravy. The weekly food order arrived from Pal System as usual. I unpacked it and discovered that the cooked chicken I’d ordered was frozen!! Sh*t F*ck B*gger! The kids were hungry and needed to eat pretty soonish so I decided I would go to the local super and pick up some roast chicken of any descripion. Fed up of watching Little Britain on his computer (without any subtitles!!??), Tadashi was snoozing on the bed. I told him what I was going to do and he said he’d go. The supermarket is 5 mins away on foot. We have a shopping bike we use and he grabbed the keys and left.

Two hours later he returns home.

In the meantime I had fed the kids the roast spuds, carrots, sprouts (no goer) and found some breaded chicken in the freezer which I pan fried and they scoffed it down. The bath was running, the dishes had been washed and the kitchen counter was spotless.

Me: Where have you been?
Hub: OK supermarket.
Me: No, where did you go?
Hub: to OK. I got some of those senbe the kids like.
Me: Not the 7-11 to do some “tachi yomi”? (standing in a shop reading the mags)
Hub: Yeah, just for ten mins.
Me: You have been gone two hours.
Hub: Really! I left about 3pm.
Me: No, you left at 2:30 and it’s now 4:30pm.

I was livid but kept my calm as I put on my coat and told him I was going out for at least the two hours he spent plus more for the 5 hours he has spent infront of his computer all day.

Had no idea where I was going! Headed to Kinshicho to check out the cinemas. Nothing remotely worth watching. Mostly Japanese movies. Nearly caught the train to Shibuya but decided I just needed a wonder around and maybe do some retail therapy. Bumped into a friend, Shoko and her husband and 3yr old son – doing family Christmassy things. Had a bitch to her and she was worried coz they may have to move to Shanghai with her hub’s job. She has a job too and her son is settled in a nursery.

Managed to get some bargains. One nice dressy sweater top for me (in a green colour I wouldn’t normally wear), an off white fleece jacket from the bargain bin at Uniqlo to wear around the house over my pjs as th nights get colder, a pair of Lightening McQueen trainers for James, a pink pair of t-bar girly shoes for Alexa (her reaction – Yada!), some bits and bobs from the 100 yen shop – hiragana, katakana, abc,123 notebooks. The kind you use with a white board marker. I want James to take them to daycare to liven up his day as he is bored rigid with non-stop play. Also picked up the New Year cards which look fab. Now just have the arduous task of writing out the addresses.

Anyway, my phone rings and it’s Tadashi. “Where are the nappies?” I swear I am not making this up. I get the story of how he had just put Alexa in the bath (the one I’d prepared) and James does a poo in the shower. Not literally, but standing in the shower next to the bath in his nappy when he decides to do a poo. Tadashi had to get Alexa out of the bath, change James’ nappy and then get them both in the bath again. I reminded him that both James and Alexa shit everyday, yet I don’t ring him and tell him everytime one of them does a crap!.
Hub: What time are you coming home?
Christ, I’ve not been gone 30 minutes!
Me: Don’t know. Am enjoying being on my own for a while.

There was an email too, asking me if it was OK to go ahead and eat his dinner. I later learn that dinner for all three of them was the roast chicken thighs he’s bought at the supermarket and some instant ramen (noodles). He couldn’t even be bothered to put some veggies on a plate and heat them up in the microwave!

Add to this the fact that James has suddenly had a major personality change over the past few days. My sweet little 3yr old has disappeared (well not always sweet, but manageable) and has been replaced by someone with violent mood swings. Making demands, screams and cries for no apparent reason. This probably sounds like any 3yrs old, but I feel he has changed drastically over the past few weeks. His tone of voice as he screams and makes his demands his awful. I’ve tried various tactics but am at my wit’s end. He seems like a very unhappy boy. It must be days since he laughed. He kicks up a fuss over EVERYTHING. He won’t wear a coat to go outside, he gets physically violent when you try to take off his nappy in the morns. He doesn’t want to wear a nappy, but he doesn’t want to wear underpants. He won’t use the loo or potty at the moment anyhow. He HATES nursery and I think this is the root of the problem. I send him to nursery (against his wishes) and so he doesn’t co-operate when we are at home. He stopped using the toilet altogether after starting nursery. He tells me the toilet at nursery is dirty. The staff have not been very supportive of toilet training and tell me he’s not ready. Yet before I sent him to nursery he was using the toilet and potty at home. The big prob was language. James has only started to use Japanese these past few months. Despite knowing the words in Japanese for wee wee and poo poo, he didn’t say anything. Despite me telling the staff the words James uses in English, they never took him to the toilet despite my instructions. Aaarrrghhh! Lots of friends tell me how it was the daycare staff who took complete charge over toilet training and started it on their kids’ 2nd birthday. “Send them in regular underwear” kind of attitude. I wish I had been so lucky. Anyway, it’s one reason to try and find another nursery for the kids in April. I do not qualify for public hoikuen as I do not work full time. I also do not know my new schedule yet and have missed the deadline for applications. Will apply anyhow as soon as I know my hours. There are other private nurseries I’m gonna apply for in March (I have been told is when they start taking reservations). I REALLY hope we can find a decent one that opens early enough for ME to get them ready and get myself to work on time.

Today (Dec 24th) is our wedding anniversary. Tadashi has forgotten, well more than likely just can’t be arse to even say “Happy Anniversary”. What is it with Japanese men? I gave him a present this morning. He left it in the genkan (entrance) and didn’t even bother to open it. I made a nice dinner – similar to the one we should have eaten yesterday – and I did get an “umai” (yummy) out of him.

Anyway, I am looking forward to a proper Christmas round at Emma’s place on Friday. It’ll be nice to spend the day with people that know how to enjoy themselves.